Dealing with mental illness when moving into a house share

Yesterday (October 1st) I moved back up to Birmingham, I’ve lived here for the past four years, but recently moved back to Essex (home) for a few weeks (while I was waiting for my new room to become available).

New Adventures

It’s been so nice being back at home for the past month, free food, the worlds comfiest bed and the worlds most amazing cat. (Yep). Oh and of course my family 😉

Smokey! :)
Smokey! 🙂

Bringing things into a wider perspective (and preventing myself from posting any more photos of my cat)… The last few months have been pretty ‘full on’ in terms of my health. I was referred to a Community Mental Health Team (CMHT), in response to how I was trying to cope with my anxiety, certain aspects of trauma which were lingering on my mind and more. Once I was referred I started struggling – but in a different way. I started to deal with things very unhealthily, which led to other physical health issues (whoever says mental illness isn’t physical is 100% wrong). In all honesty this was just me trying to adapt to the change – having to talk to Community Psychiatric Nurses, Medics and more meant that I was constantly revisiting things that left me feeling pretty exhausted, and vulnerable. Fortunately I have an incredible circle of individuals who I can go to when I’m really struggling, especially the wonderful support services at my University.

I’m at a place now where I’m just beginning therapy (currently I’m tackling CBT and will be starting EMDR in the future). I feel very comfortable with the support system I now have in place, but it’s a little strange as I’m finishing my studying so I’m a little worried I won’t be able to contact my team at my University (but we’ll see how that one works out!)

Moving into a new house share was both really exciting, and terrifying! I am the worst at small talk – if something is awkward I have to fight every urge not to point out that it’s awkward. So, I was a little stressed when driving up to Birmingham (3 hours of driving gives you a lot of time to panic!) But, fortunately it was for no reason as everyone is lovely, and they were all really welcoming!

I was having a little think this morning, and it hadn’t really crossed my mind before. But at what point do you tell your new house mates about your mental health? Like… is that a thing? Do they need to be told? What if they take it the wrong way? What if they’re reading this now?! (Hello if you are!)

I don’t normally feel too much apprehension when disclosing my mental health issues to others – I mean I publicly write about it, so that’s made telling people a little easier! But at the same time I am very aware that some people may not feel comfortable talking about such issues, and of course the little voice in my mind is telling me not to become a burden!

Currently at the moment I’m not letting this matter dwell on my mind too much, my new house mates seem really nice and I have a feeling I’ll tell them when I feel comfortable. The last flat I lived in I only actually told one of four other flatmates, so I’m not going to let this bother me too much! But, I’ve had this conversation with others before, and I wondered – is this an issue? Have others faced stigma or received a negative response before when disclosing their mental illness? Is it something to be worried about, or do we need not dwell on this? Of course, stigma doesn’t make this matter any easier, and unfortunately some people still view mental illness to be a negative, threatening issue… and I don’t want this to be the case!

Let me know your take on this topic! 🙂 



  1. i’m glad to read of your openness and acceptance of your illness, and i’m happy you have a supportive community around you. i have a relative who is just beginning to come to terms with her mental illness and i know she feels judged by the societal stigma some still attach to this. just like any other illness, people need support and treatment to feel better. it saddens me that some don’t see this. best to you and thank you for sharing, it helps others you can’t even know – beth


    • Thank-you for your comment 🙂 Unfortunately stigma is just something that people with mental illness face, but there’s so many levels of stigma, and I think coming to terms with your own illness, your own situation (like your friend) certainly helps when it comes to dealing with stigma. I always find (and I know I may sound like a broken record) but the best a friend can do to help another is just be there! 🙂 It seems your friend has been open to you, and that’s lovely that she trusts you 🙂 You seem like a good egg!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I am no longer sure where you are getting your info, however great topic.
    I must spend a while studying much more or working out more.
    Thanks for fantastic info I was looking for this information for my mission.


    • Hi, thanks for your comment – all the info I provide on Dearest Someone, is derivative from my own experience of mental illness.

      I repeatedly try to make sure readers know that I cannot offer any professional advice, and I cannot guarantee the authenticity of content which is not my own (which is why I always reference external content.)

      This blog is focused on my own experience, which I always provide a truthful account of.

      I’m glad that you have found my blog useful though 🙂


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